Learn4Life: Courageous Conversations. Benefits Expand Courage.
Post inspiration: The Jan 2010 Compass Coaching Map I choose was Create Courageous Conversations. So, I decided to blog about it during the month and through the rest of Q1. 
This map was developed by Margie Warrell and Soni Pitts.
Finding the courage to have courageous conversations.
FOCUS ON THE BENEFITS FIRST.
Brad Federman @bfederman Suggests in his book Employee Engagement that we should focus on the benefits before the risks.
What is the benefit of listening carefully?
What is the benefit of preparing for a conversation, making a list of questions and facts that need to be discussed?
What is the benefit of resolving this issue?
It may be challenging and risky but if it can resolve an issue that if NOT resolved will be repeated each day for the next 120 days and beyond you have scored BIG. Think of eliminating 120 repeats of the problem and focus on the facts that are missing.
Make a short plan then have that conversation:
Example:
What is my objective? share my view of the situation and ask for a suggestion on how improve the misunderstandings.
Who do you need to talk to? Name of person, group, etc. Something about them: for instance: You know they are not analytical, more a people person, not prone to keeping schedules.
What approach will you use? Keep it very simple. Put a follow-up plan in place the that takes into account this person’s style.
Learn4Life: Create Courageous Conversations 17-20 (linkes to 1-16 in that post)
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My plug for Compass and Kristy my Coach:
Kristi Arndt, PhD, IAC-CC
Compass Presidential Ambassador & Founding Team Coach
kristiarndt@yahoo.com
Experience the Gift of Compass
www.ilovecompass.com
Affordable Life Coaching Programs
www.compassclient.com
Rewarding Business Opportunity
www.compassrep.com
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Jim Sutton
Facilitating understanding in the digital age
Virtual World LightHouse
Web 2.0 Community & Business
About Me Page
February 8th, 2010 at 01:00
I love the statement “focus on the benefits before the risks.”
Too often people think there could be nothing worse than being authentic, transparent, and honest enough to have a meaningful conversation about a sensitive, difficult-to-talk-about topic.
I agree with you, Jim. Not having the conversation out of fear (of being misunderstood, rejected, hurting someone else, and more, I’m sure) only gives the situation opportunity to get worse and expand to taint other areas, situations, or people.
Knowing this, it makes sense to develop communication skills, the basic ones at the very least: Active listening, making statements and requests, and asking effective questions. PET: Parent Effectiveness Training by Thomas Gordon is probably the single best book I’ve read on communication skills. While it’s targeted at parents, to me it’s better than the other books by Thomas. It just means you ‘read between the lines.’ It’s worth the stretch!
February 10th, 2010 at 22:20
Bonnie,
Glad you stopped by. Thanks for the book suggestion.
You are a marketing expert, when do marketing people run into conversations they may want to avoid?
Q. One thing you can give away….and keep. Answer: Your word